Feminism and Femininity: How to be a Woman and a Lady.

This is a topic that is on my heart. I was raised in a liberated household but had much influence from a traditional time. My mother taught me to be who I wanted and to say whatever needs to be said. I was taught to stand up for myself, and demand fair treatment. At the same time I attended etiquette classes, wore pantyhose, and was presented to society as a debutante in a cotillion (of course I rebelled against it at the time). As an adult, I tend to look for an opportunity to empower other women, be it personally or through business. At the same time I have a traditional home environment where I stay home with my children and my husband works. Even though I am heavily invested in both ways of life, I'm not torn. I believe that women should have equal rights/pay/etc. I also believe that we, as a society, will learn the hard way, that equality comes at a price. When we start asking, "Where is chivalry?" and "Why is no one kind?" we would have to look harder into male and female equality. Today, we tend to link feminism with male bashing and a tougher exterior, but that's not necessarily the truth.




Physical Presence
I hate to see women who are not ladies. The masculine look is not it for me. The masculine mannerisms are not for me. I am a polish wearing, hair flipping, nose powdering female. I may put on a pair of jeans and a set of tennis shoes,

Favorite Feminine Blog www.thatitgirl.com

but there is no doubt in anyone's eyes that I am a lady. I'm not telling you to be a priss-pot, but good grief, wear pants that accentuate your curves! And stop basing your voice on purpose. It's not cute. You have every right to wear what you want to wear, as do I. If I choose to put on an apron and a string of pearls and prance around my house as if I were Julia Child, that's my choice. (By the way, that "homemaker" was a feminist by her work. She was the first woman on public television.) But dressing like a "man" will not gain anymore respect or equality for you, me, or anyone else. It sets women back (if you ask me).

Great advice on how tobealady.tumblr.com

Career Choices
As a woman I do take on sneers and comments when I reveal that I am a stay at home mother. Like what I do has little/no value or importance. Truth be told, I love my job more than anything in the world. I get to teach and raise people that I love and I get to fool around with the boss... No, really, I couldn't imagine doing anything more important. I'm not knocking any other mother out there who is working either. If this is what you choose to do, that's fine. This is where I think feminism counts. We have the choice to do what we wish; be it successfully raising our children or successfully climbing the career ladder.

Dating
In my (Black)culture, women have a difficult time with feminism and relationships. We tend to put our male counterparts down. We disrespect them. We are being misandristic, and we fail to realize it. We place a low value on a man and treat  him as such. We fail to build him up and encourage his dreams. If he isn't pursuing his goals we see him as dead weight. Stop under appreciating men and be a lady. Be kind and compassionate. And most importantly, let him be a man.